April Winchell

Blog Drought

Many of you have written to me over the past few months, telling me that you visit this web site everyday, staring at the same entry for weeks and wondering what the hell happened to me.

I wish I could do better. I really do. But life has changed pretty dramatically over the last 4 months, and this site is becoming harder and harder to maintain.

For one thing, I don't have the time anymore. I know that sounds odd coming from someone who hasn't had a job in a year, but this is a period of intense personal growth, and I find I have to be in the world to learn my lessons. Sitting at the computer everyday and typing into a void puts me in a sort of vacuum, and you can't learn much in there.

Secondly, I'm not feeling particularly funny. I would never admit this, and I'll deny it if you tell anyone, but the events of the last year have left me pretty frustrated professionally. Almost nothing that has been promised to me or that I've worked hard for has panned out. Animation has dried up, thanks to some monumental flops Disney churned out, pilot season has been largely uneventful and the plum little job I was promised at KNX just never materialized (thanks, DGH).

On top of that, the construction on my house, which was supposed to take about 4 months, is nearing its 1 year anniversary with no sign of completion. I don't know what you're supposed to give one your one year anniversary, but I think it's a subpoena.

And let me also throw in my profound disappointment with the shitbag who bailed on the Ebay auction I had for charity a few weeks ago. This pustule actually sniped the auction to become the high bidder, and then vanished, never responding to my emails. Way to go, you festering carbunkle.

One of the only bright spots for me right now, besides my wonderful husband and boyfriend (and don't I sound modern), is my bi-monthly gig with Mr. KABC. Mr. K is the only person in Los Angeles who backed up his praise with actual support. A lot of people said I should be on the air, but he did something about it.

I really look forward to those shows. I even look forward to the incredibly hostile and critical email you reflexively shoot me after every appearance. It's gratifying to know I can still piss people off, simply by virtue of being myself.

I'll be on his show again this Friday, from 9:00 to midnight. Tune into KABC 790 AM, or listen to live streaming here. I'll have a few things to discuss, namely some staggering celebrity sightings (Bon Jovi, that's all I'm saying) and the most humane way to kill a pig. It isn't much, but it's all I got.

Well, actually, no. I do have a little more.

I've got two new shows archived for your listening displeasure. The first one (1/30/04) has been dubbed "The Antagonistic Show", in which Mr. K and I almost came to blows. I don't remember what was going on there, but I can tell you one thing, it wasn't good. The second show (2/27/04) is the one where Mr. K invited my boyfriend Patrick to come on. It's the uncensored version, so you can hear the language Mr. K dumped out of the show in a blind panic. I particularly like this show since it rattled Mr. K's cage so badly, which, as you know, is what I live for.

Email of the Week

Subject: Evil Twin
Date: Wed, 17 Mar 2004 10:52:49 -0500
From: Justin (REMOVED)
To: april@aprilwinchell.com

Reading a story about a skirt wearing 56-year old man arrested for indecent exposure when it hit me that he looked like Jack Klugman’s evil twin. Thought of you immediately.

That's uncanny. —AW