April Winchell

Vegas, Baby

I just got back from a few days in Vegas. I had three exceptional experiences there, and this puts me in something of a quandry.

You see, I'm going to be on the radio with Mr. KABC this Friday night. And while I desperately want to tell you what happened in Vegas, I will be completely out of material Friday if I do.

Then again, I like to think I am semi-famous for having no content, so I really have nothing to lose.

So I tell you what.

I'll tell you two of these experiences right now and save the big one for Mr. KABC. That's fair, isn't it? Sure it is.

And I'll even give you a big hint: it's the most glamourous and exciting star sighting I've ever seen. Right there in Vegas, walking around like a person on the street. In front of God and everyone.

Really, I almost passed out. It was life-altering.

All right, so that's Friday. And tune in for stories about my dental misery, because God knows, there's nothing more entertaining than hearing someone complain about their teeth.

Okay, so now for the other two experiences.

Penn & Teller

I went to see Penn & Teller. Penn started the show crapping on Vegas, which I just love. The best line of the night was when he called Lance Burton a "greasy hillbilly in a tuxedo". I about fell off the chair.

Of course, I really wanted a picture, but my camera died. Fortunately, we still had my phone. Isn't technology exciting?

I got this shot of me and Penn after the show. If I look like E.T., it's because I'm straining in 4 inch heels to get close to his height. The man is a giant.

I also got a picture of Teller sniffing me, but I forgot to save it.

By the way, Teller speaks.

Me and Mr. Spock

I was goaded into going to "Star Trek, The Experience" at the Hilton.

Normally, I don't hold much fondness for characters in costumes roaming around the casino. It seems wrong to me. I don't need a Borg looking over my shoulder while I'm playing video poker.

But I figured, what the hell. It can't be more frightening than the time I saw Louie Anderson playing slots at the Rio.

So we went, and the whole thing was pretty fun. Really, really stupid, but fun.When you first get into the Star trek area (part of which was closed by the way – for a wedding), they take your picture against a blue screen. So you know something bad is coming.

At at the end of the ride, you're coralled into a little area where they try to sell you your photo. Yes, for a mere $19.95, you can buy a picture of yourself, superimposed with the Star Trek cast of your choice.

Can you believe it? Seriously, what kind of a loser would even want something like that?

I went with The Wrath of Khan.

Speaking of Spock

I got a little treat in my post office box the other day that sent me into spasms of joy.

A brilliant ansd twisted man by the name of Mike Carano has mounted a live production of an actual Star Trek episode called, "Spock's Brain". He sent me a DVD of the show, and I laughed so hard I nearly soiled myself.

This is not a parody. It's an actual, word for word re-enactment of the episode, and the cast is dead on. The guy playing Kirk is just hysterically accurate, and has Shatner's mannerisms and delivery down pat.

Actually, everybody is great, from Spock to Chekov to Scotty. They veer dangerously close to spoof, but never cross the line, which is very hard to do. The sets are cheesey as hell (just like the original), and the whole thing is just a scream.

The show is playing at The Improv in Irvine until November 17th, and I highly recommend you go. You can get tickets and other information here