April Winchell

Well, I’m finally moved in to my new place. And as moves go, it was hell.

The elevator in my old apartment building went out on Friday, and stayed out for about 6 days. So that was good, especially since my move was Monday.

Now granted, we did have professional movers haul the heavy shit, so it fell to other people to drag my bed, couch, entertainment unit and full grown trees down 5 flights of stairs. But everything leading up to the move, including bringing in boxes and moving all the little crap, was something John and I got to do. For days. Up and down 5 flights of stairs. With an elderly chihuahua and a new puppy. God help us.

Fortunately, the stress and exhaustion brought on colds for both of us, so we were able to stop every few steps and blow our noses. And the puppy had diarrhea for about a week, so all in all, it was a good time.

In the midst of all this madness, it became imperative that we get the chihuahua’s teeth cleaned. This is something that hadn’t been done since Carter was in office, so it was a job. And of course, when a dog is 130 years old, it’s not the safest thing to put them under, because they don’t always wake up. So believe me, it was not a risk we would have taken, had the dog’s breath not been so fetid as to make your skin melt off, like the guy in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

I know I’m prone to exaggeration, but in this case, I think I’m understating things. John refers to this odor as “grave breath”. It really is the stink of the dead. So it should not have come as any great surprise to discover, upon picking her up from the vet, that the problem was further reaching than halitosis. In fact, the discharge sheet stated that “several teeth had to be pulled”, which translated to 5 or so. This leaves her with one tooth in the front, like Nanny McPhee. And it only cost about $600.

Newly Archived Show!

I am almost done archiving the show from January 13th. All three hours are uploaded, though as of this writing, the indexing is not quite completed. It should be done today, though.

I am also awaiting the show from January 27th, which is being encoded for Real Player and Windows Media Player righ this verty moment. Hopefully that show will be up shortly as well.

New Music!

I have some really great German pop covers for you, which I played on Mr. KABC the last time I was on. The trouble is, I can’t quite get them formatted properly, and they’re entirely too large to upload. I’ll keep working on it, because I really want you to be able to have your own copy of “How Deep in Your Love” in German. It’s important to your development.

In the meantime, I do have one new German track sent to me by longtime ex-listener Alex. Visit the “German Covers” section on my Multimedia page for Hildegard Knef’s ill-advised version of “The Coffee Song”.

New Web Site Section!

Have you noticed the photos I’ve been adding?

Look at the menu to the left over there and you’ll see a new section called “Gallery”. This is where I’ll be uploading family photos, shots of my dad’s television appearances, and lots of other never before seen photos. Click on the thumbnails for full sized images.

I really didn’t want to muck up the shots by putting my web site on them. That may be foolish, and I may have to revisit that decision later on. But in the meantime, I’m just asking you not to post them elsewhere without giving me some credit, or a link back to the site. I appreciate it!

On the Radio

This Friday night, I’ll be on live with Mr. KABC, 9:00 - Midnight. Tune to AM 790, or listen to live streaming here.

Obviously, I’ll have a lot to talk about.

Well, not really, since I already told you about the dog getting her teeth cleaned.

But I do have some bile reserved for the frauds at eBay. Did you know they have a loophole in their “Buyer Protection Program” which can result in getting ripped off for an unlimited amount of money, and being reimbursed as little as fifty-three cents? Me neither, until it happened to me this week! Special thanks to eBay Claims Adjuster”Sabrinah”, who is not only a complete fucking idiot, but spells her name like a 13 year old. I bet she uses Bonne Bell lip slickers. Tool.

And Home Depot is working my last nerve. Apparently “curbside delivery” means “we dump it your parking garage and run as fast as we can”. This is different than “white glove delivery”, which means, “we dump it in your parking garage and run as fast as we can. But we call you first”.

And Finally . . .

Next Wednesday, February 15th, I’ll be live on stage at Acme Comedy Theatre, on the panel of What’s My Line. This is a live restaging of the classic game show, hosted by J. Keith Van Straaten, and it’s a really great time.

The “celebrity” panel generally plays really well, and it’s a lot of fun to see us try to figure it all out. And God love tJ. Keith, he gets a killer mystery guest week after week. Past guests have included Julie Newmar, Drew Carey, George Takei, Elliot Gould and yes, Michael and Kitty Dukakis. Go figure.

Visit the web site for tickets and more information. It will be a great time, and you can see my new haircut. Special thanks to the dickwad in the Yahoo Group who said my old hair made me look like Liza Minnelli.

You think I don’t read that shit, but I do.