Well, here it is. The podcast I had hoped to put up last week while I was in New York.
I couldn’t, of course, because nothing ever works the way it’s supposed to and something always goes wrong and everyone is an asshole. And I don’t think I’m overstating my case.
It turns out the reason I had no internet access last week is because my account was “suspended” by AT&T.
Why, you ask?
Because I moved.
That’s right. I moved. I had the audacity to pack my things and move to a different home, and AT&T had some real issues with that.
Apparently you have to register with AT & T when you move. And apparently that’s a whole different thing than calling them up and saying, hey can you transfer my service to this new address? And them saying, sure, and then they send a bill to the new place.
This isn’t that.
This is something else. Although no one can tell you what it is. But you have a 30 day grace period to get it done, so you better not fuck around.
Anyway, here’s the podcast. I don’t know how good it is, but at least I don’t have a cold yet, and I’m still somewhat pleasant. Considering how things have been going lately, this one could be something of a novelty.
47 responses so far ↓
1 PaulJonnes // Apr 7, 2008 at 1:35 pm
First!
2 steve // Apr 7, 2008 at 1:52 pm
Fist!
3 Knavish Rogue // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Toilets at the dinner table you say?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0srdtZSiOE
Luis Bunuel beat you to it April!
4 Gina // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:16 pm
Marc left out the best part about Gloria Allred’s press conference.
“The last time I checked, a nipple is not a dangerous weapon.”
5 Turntablist // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:17 pm
It’s the worst being mistaken for fat, ugly celebrities. I wear bold black glasses and, often, strangers come up to me and tell me that I look like Drew Carey. This makes me pissed because Drew Carey, while funny, is NOT a good looking man while I, let’s face it, AM a good-looking man.
So now, I shoot back at them with something like:
Them: “Hey. You know who you look like?: Drew Carey! Ohmigod tottaaallyyyy”
Me (with huge smile): “You know thats weird because I was just about to approach you, perfect stranger, and tell you that you look like a mix between Dom Deluise, Roseanne and the Elephant Man. I mean it’s un-fucking-canny… Wow.”
6 inerror // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:21 pm
I really miss hearing listeners call in with immediate, spontaneous, interactive, two-way, verbal feedback to the discussion between Marc and April. I always wished the Mister K show would have taken more calls when he had April on. But they usually just talked among themselves as they do on the podcast - which is fun. But call-ins complete the experience - jackasses and all.
7 Speedy Cerviche // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:31 pm
HAYYY APRIL ITS ME PATRICK DURRRRRRRR
8 inerror // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Ever notice how April resembles Knucklehead Smith. I’ll bet if you gave April a buzz-cut she’d look just like Knuck. Or if you put a wig on Winchell Mahoney he’d look just like April. What a cruel trick her father played on her. No wonder she’s so distraught.
9 thefifthbeatle // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:48 pm
ALMOST-TENTH
I’m sure the podcast is great - they always are!
10 inerror // Apr 7, 2008 at 2:53 pm
Google Aptil
The support person was totally in the right. For all he knew, there could be a user choosing a fictitious name of Aptil for their account registered under the name of Aptil. Don’t hate network administrators just because they’re anal. If they weren’t the internet would be stuck at 1995… And that means no podcasts.
11 clevelandphil // Apr 7, 2008 at 3:05 pm
I like How Clean Is Your House? You can keep You Are What You Eat.
12 JohnnyBoy // Apr 7, 2008 at 3:27 pm
If you want to google something, try “Dairy of Anne Frank”
13 Duns // Apr 7, 2008 at 4:18 pm
This podcast is so culturally philosophical I am positively, satisfyingly pleased!!!
14 adorisday // Apr 7, 2008 at 4:26 pm
After claiming to be such a smartie pants Apple goil, now I have to confess… I have no idea if I can — or if it is possible — to put these podcasts on my iPod or iPhone to listen to whilst at the gym, the store, taking a walk or just sitting on my ass with headphones in my ear.
Is it possible to get April’s podcasts on iTunes somehow?
The other weird thing is I don’t recall downloading or transferring any of April’s stuff to iTunes — yet, I have half a dozen or so five-minute April bits-o-comedy already on my iTunes.
Sorry so dumb, but does anyone put these on their mp3 players or iPods? Can we buy them from April in this format?
15 Speedy Cerviche // Apr 7, 2008 at 5:55 pm
@adorisday
These are free. Podcasts are free. April is free. Why would you even think of paying for something that is offered without charge?
To answer your question: yes, I listen to these podcasts on my PMP (portable media player, for the acronym-challenged). Then again, I happen to have a good media player that doesn’t require you to install useless crapware just to use the damn thing.
You are a “smart Apple goil”. I guess this means you have a great deal of brand loyalty. I find this kind of brand loyalty hard to fathom. In the bizarro world in which I reside, we actually consider things like usability, sound quality, cost, etc before we make an electronics purchase. We then decide what device best suits our needs at the time. This device very rarely ends up being an ipod, as ipods have poor sound quality and are hilariously overpriced. Next time you decide to buy a PMP, please, please, PLEASE take into account factors other than KoolAid-sippin’ loyalty and trendiness.
I can vouch for my current PMP, the Cowon iAudio D2. Touchscreen, excellent sound, and a smooth drag-and-drop usb interface. By drag-and-drop, I mean I simply drop the mp3 into the device in order to copy it there. And that’s it. A monkey can do it. Sure beats itunes. So give it a shot next time. You won’t be trendy, but you will be a happier person.
However, since you already have an ipod, I will offer you one thing that will make your life easier: RockBox. http://www.rockbox.org/
It won’t help you with your shitty ipod sound quality, but it will rid you of your spywa- I mean itunes. It’s an open-source firmware replacement for the ipod and it will rid you of the need to use itunes for music transfer. It adds a drag-and-drop interface so you can load any audio file you can find on your hard drive onto your ipod. No itunes dickery, no m4a conversion, no jacking around, no ham-fisted attempts to curb “piracy” (what, you didn’t know? That’s the reason the itunes interface was created. WAKE UP SHEEPLE etc). Believe me, you will thank me.
It’s a nice half-measure until you upgrade to a real PMP.
16 Speedy Cerviche // Apr 7, 2008 at 5:59 pm
How’s that for a rant? pal Jacky, touch that.
But seriously, I’m not trying to be cute or snarky or anything when I suggest RockBox. I know many people who have tried it, and I have yet to hear any complaints. It really is an improvement over the standard firmware.
17 eBayEnigma // Apr 7, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I like what happens when you google “Aptil”. LOL I know what “TSA” really stands for:
Thousands Standing Around
I don’t like “What Not To Wear” either. They’re too mean.
18 auzjeweii // Apr 7, 2008 at 7:54 pm
Whenever you’re told that the call “may be recorded for quality assurance,” it’s permission to go ahead and record it yourself.
19 coasterboy // Apr 7, 2008 at 8:08 pm
I thought April was going to shitcan anyone who engaged in pontificating on Apple vs. other platforms…..
20 inerror // Apr 7, 2008 at 8:14 pm
21 inerror // Apr 7, 2008 at 8:18 pm
Aptil on YouTube
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1jEocbjRik
22 David // Apr 7, 2008 at 8:30 pm
TLC’s What Not to Wear is horrible. They are evil!
23 adorisday // Apr 7, 2008 at 9:52 pm
@ Speedy - Thanks. Have to downgrade iTunes to drag n’drop April’s files.
24 socalfrank // Apr 7, 2008 at 10:34 pm
April, why didn’t you tell us about the Yankee stadium story? Did you and John see any game?
25 jim // Apr 7, 2008 at 10:46 pm
Ooh - rickroll reference!
It’s getting ever more prevalent - I’ve been rickrolled twice in the last few months. The phrase “that you HAVE to see” is a link that should be approached with caution on Ye Olde Web.
Opaque? Uh oh … someone’s hiding something, & you better hope it doesn’t have 6 legs & antennae. PROTIP: items like dip, pudding & soup should NOT be crunchy.
DHS: letting insecure losers piss in America’s punchbowl since 2002. With pay. You can now sleep easy, as the terrorists are too busy rolling on the floors of their caves laughing at you to set up their next attack. Uniforms may cause brain damage, approach those in them with caution, especially if armed.
You’re right.
Everyone IS an asshole - to a proctologist.
26 inerror // Apr 8, 2008 at 1:15 am
Aptil framed:
http://www.pbase.com/robwooly/image/93785670
27 inerror // Apr 8, 2008 at 1:32 am
I don’t mean to mock. Bud did April expect her internet access to travel with her to her new location without the benefit of informing her ISP of her change in residence? I’ve listened to her enough to be convinced she’s a very smart chick. But sometimes these internets just seem magical to the point we start thinking we don’t need to attend to things like having the provider send the service someplace new. Of course some day it will be that way…wireless or satellite or microwave whatever. That’ll be when Big Brother knows everything about us every second of our existence…Minority Report and all that.
28 sleepytako // Apr 8, 2008 at 5:44 am
Beef tongue is great! Don’t be dissing it. I donno about the mayo part, but I get it all the time at my friends okonomiyaki restaurant. It’s just grilled on a teppan with some oil, pepper, and lemon juice. It’s almost the most perfect “meat” experience. Just meat proudly saying I’m meat and I’m really good tasting. If you ever come out to Japan you gotta try it.
29 bnaivar // Apr 8, 2008 at 7:19 am
Isn’t David Caruso from CSI Miami?
30 David // Apr 8, 2008 at 9:25 am
socalfrank,
I believe this podcast was made before her trip to New York.
31 JohnnyBoy // Apr 8, 2008 at 10:06 am
” The internet… is that the one with the E-mail?”
Corey Taft - For Your Consideration
32 inerror // Apr 8, 2008 at 10:55 am
IMDB says he was born in Forest Hills, NY. Maybe he was there for the home team game. What a goolish photo April chose of him. Blood red hair above drained white skin pierced by Manson like eyes framed in all black. All he needs is a pair of fangs and he’d be a Dracula look alike.
I have to add that the Firefox spell checker did not acknowledge “goolish” as a legitimate, properly spelled word. This has me quite distraught.
33 JohnnyBoy // Apr 8, 2008 at 11:52 am
Forest Hills is right close to Shea Stadium, but their opening day is today
34 markus // Apr 8, 2008 at 1:03 pm
probably because it’s “ghoulish” maybe?
35 inerror // Apr 8, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Oh ya, like in ghougle. Hey, check it out. A web page for those who can’t find the “Bookmark” or “Favorites” button in their web browser: http://www.ghougle.com/
Forest Hills: Where Californians go after they die. Where New York Yankee vampires (as opposed to umpires) dabble with corpses.
36 Speedy Cerviche // Apr 8, 2008 at 1:39 pm
While we’re on the subject, does anyone know the proper number of times a beef tongue w/onions should be flipped?
Personally, I think the proper number is zero. I mean, the onions would fall into the fire otherwise.
I hope no one gets that reference.
Also, RickRolling was funny for about three minutes back in 2004. After that, it was just lame.
The original will always be the best, anyway. All hail the DuckRoll!
37 pal Jacky // Apr 8, 2008 at 2:07 pm
david caruso was in the worst butt fucking film of all time,William friedkin’s ‘jade’. It was the first film he made when he decided to leave a hit show to become a ‘film star’. Those unfamilier with friedkin should know that he is a completely inept director who idiot savanted his way into two classic films early in his career and then got dreck pile after dreck pile bankrolled since then.
38 adorisday // Apr 8, 2008 at 2:31 pm
I agree with the idiot savanted idea about Friedkin (both THE EXORCIST and CRUISING scared the heck out of me) but he also happened to marry the head of Paramount Studios, Sherry Lansing, which somehow helped him get films like JADE greenlit.
39 clevelandphil // Apr 8, 2008 at 2:50 pm
But pal Jacky, William Friedkin did give us The C.A.T Squad.
40 thefifthbeatle // Apr 8, 2008 at 2:53 pm
I never “got” Rickrolling.
But then again, what IS there to get? It’s Rick fuckin’ Astley - not one of the most COMPLEX…erm…artistes in the music biz.
41 pal Jacky // Apr 8, 2008 at 4:59 pm
the sad part is I’m still buying into the friedkin myth. I saw ‘bug’. Of course, I loose control when Ashley Judd is envolved. if you are going to photograph a stage play as is make it be something like ‘marat/ Sade’, a play that is at least provocative enough to stand up on its own. I hated ‘to live and die in l.a.(harbor)’ and wrote him off way back then. But I seem to forget when its time to plunk down $9.50.
42 pal Jacky // Apr 8, 2008 at 5:06 pm
Let us not judge TLC for one show. Remember comedy central give us ‘mind of Mencia’. TLC has the best freak shows of them all. I’m talking girl with two heads type shows. They kept calling her twins even though the second head looked as dead in the eyes as george bush. They have got fat people shows. Not ‘biggest loser’ types we’re talking tearing the wall out and lifting out with a crane types. Their ‘midge’ reality show has also lightened up. No longer are they just complaining that people don’t trat the as real people. They are finally acting like a family of side show gwarks like they are.
43 eBayEnigma // Apr 8, 2008 at 6:29 pm
I like a few shows on TLC. “Take Home Chef” comes to mind as one that I like. But I may tire of it pretty soon. I already kicked “Jon & Kate Plus 8″ to the curb. I used to like it but I got tired of it, as I have of most TV shows. I pretty much stopped watching network TV except for Judge Judy, and People’s Court. Every once and a while TLC has my most favorite show ever, “Dr. G Medical Examiner”. =)
44 godzthor1 // Apr 9, 2008 at 4:20 am
Toilet Restaurant of Japan:
http://media.skoopy.com/misc/toilet_restaurant/
I think I saw it on “The Daily Show” or “Red Eye.”
April, that restaurant where you eat in the dark was featured on a recent episode of “CSI: Not Miami.”
45 Hunnyoil // Apr 9, 2008 at 12:32 pm
WHAT? How could you not like Jon & Kate + 8?? It is a riot! And those older twins are MEAN!!!! I like how Jon NEVER talks but when he does it is usually either yelling at Kate or something funny. AND for some odd reason they only eat organic foods……I bet those kids have never had a Happy Meal.
46 Andre // Apr 9, 2008 at 2:00 pm
“Do you remember Rick Astley?
He had a big fat hit. It was ghastly.”
Nick Lowe - “All Men Are Liars”
47 Eiain // Apr 20, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Just a correction to Marks comment on the BBC. The BBC is not paid for by the government, but paid for by the public at £139.50 a year, which is charged to each and every household in the UK who has a TV set. The government passed a law about 50 years ago, and if you don’t pay you are fined £1000.00 and you can go to jail too. The crap thing is that the whole of Europe can watch it without being subject to having to pay a license for it like we have to. So in truth I pay for the BBC programs that you watch.
You must log in to post a comment.