I did two jobs for Disney today, and both had unexpected bouts of low wattage excitement.
The first job was as Clarabelle the Cow. That voice tends to be a little hard on my throat sometimes, so I need lots of water when I’m working.
There was a wooden table in the booth, and when I went to set down my water bottle, I noticed someone had written their name on it. It struck me as odd that anyone would be writing on the furniture. I mean, this isn’t junior high school, it’s Disney for God’s sake.
When I saw the name, I immediately whipped out my phone and tried to take a picture of it. Unfortunately, it didn’t come out very well. But if you use your imagination and squint a little, I think you can see it says, WILMER.
I’m guessing that Mr. Valderama was suffering through a long session of Handy Manny, and elected to alleviate his boredom by tagging the furniture.
Pretty stealthy, don’t you think? No one will ever know who was responsible for that one.
Welcome to MENSA, Wilmer.
And the glamour didn’t let up. In fact, it really kicked in to high gear as I was leaving my second job.
I walked out to the parking lot and saw Tom Selleck, waiting for the valet to bring his car around.
Oh, it was too much.
I pretended to check my messages while I engaged him in small talk about cars, and discreetly took this picture with my phone.
Normally, I wouldn’t have taken the chance. I would have just come home and told you about it and drank myself to sleep.
But he was standing next to my Mini.
And unless we get into an accident, I don’t think I’ll ever get this shot again.
Tomorrow morning, I’m doing a table read for King of the Hill. I’m very excited about that. There will probably be baked goods.
I’ll see how lucky I get with my camera phone.
65 responses so far ↓
1 John Foley // Jun 12, 2008 at 4:57 pm
Clarabelle the Cow? I thought you had standards.
2 JohnnyBoy // Jun 12, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Clarabell Cow IS the standard by which all others are judged
3 clevelandphil // Jun 12, 2008 at 5:19 pm
April loves playing cows
Clarabell, Diane and Liza.
4 steve // Jun 12, 2008 at 5:37 pm
I take pictures of shit with my phone all the time. this is incredible work we’re seeing here, folks.
5 BigFatBob // Jun 12, 2008 at 5:59 pm
King of The Hill. Cool. One of the cartoon characters (Gribble) is named in honor of a long dead friend of mine from out of my youth. Mike Gribble. Mike was one of the promoters of the Spike and Mile Sick and Twisted film festival that had traveled around the country for years showing cartoons of a weird nature.
6 thefifthbeatle // Jun 12, 2008 at 7:26 pm
I love it when you have star sightings, April - and pictures? Well, they’re just an added bonus!
7 Infinite monkey // Jun 12, 2008 at 7:55 pm
Full afterburners baby!…
http://www.dfrc.nasa.gov/Gallery/Photo/SR-71/Medium/EC93-03092-5.jpg
8 joshpincusiscrying // Jun 12, 2008 at 8:12 pm
April, I LOVE your Clarabelle the Cow, especially from House of Mouse!
By the way, do THESE count as celebrity sightings?
9 Speedy Cerviche // Jun 12, 2008 at 8:20 pm
A buddy of mine just sent me an email detailing a recent star sighting of his. It was, as is April’s preference, delightfully low-wattage and included an extra side order of geekiness. I’ll wait a while to post it, so as not to steal April’s thunder.
Two words: Star Trek. Just sayin.
10 TalkinHorse // Jun 13, 2008 at 12:00 am
Hey, Beavis, uh huh huh huh, she said “job” and “hard on” and “my throat” and “whipped out” and “didn’t come”, uh huh huh huh.
11 JohnnyBoy // Jun 13, 2008 at 7:33 am
In Dairy Whey
In Angus Night
No Bovine Role
Escapes your sight
12 PeekaBooRevue // Jun 13, 2008 at 10:39 am
Little Miss Winchell has an ADORABLE car!
13 pal Jacky // Jun 13, 2008 at 11:31 am
my computer is fucked up. I think it happened when I went into safe mode. I laughed at the warnings. I wrote my first program in fortran 4 on punchcards. It reboots often and I haven’t done a system backup in six months. It was finally on long enough to back up my important files and I hopefully get through this note. I the happier side ‘maple story’ will be wiped and my bratty nephew will have to play it on his own laptop which he hates. BTW I think my nephew caused this whole thing because his father become a crackhead to celebrate his f50th birthday. Good day.
14 bnaivar // Jun 13, 2008 at 11:47 am
I would like to request some Clarabelle outtakes for the next podcast.
15 pal Jacky // Jun 13, 2008 at 12:46 pm
Thanks for telling us that it was Tom Selleck. It looks more like Tommy chong with a pony tail.
16 ScottP // Jun 13, 2008 at 1:01 pm
We know Wilmer likes everyone to know where he’s been… case in point, Mandy Moore.
17 vonriesling // Jun 13, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Having worked at the Mouse, I can safely say Disney is exactly like junior high school.
18 Andre // Jun 13, 2008 at 1:56 pm
“April loves playing cows
Clarabell, Diane and Liza.”
Good one, clevelandphil!
I love King of the Hill. It’s the little engine that could. While “The Simpsons” and “Family Guy” get all the press, “KotH” keeps chugging along, managing to be just as funny as, if not funnier than it was in the beginning.
My favorite character…Peggy.
19 jasmith31 // Jun 13, 2008 at 5:00 pm
I LOVE Tom Selleck!! I’m soooooooooooo jealous of you!!!
DAMN YOU APRIL WINCHELL!!!
thanks for sharing the pic :0
20 DavidinBerkeley // Jun 13, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Since I can’t think of anything humorous or snarky to say I will remind everyone that these juicy posts are seemingly a way to bend our minds AWAY from the fact that the super-secret Winchell/Germain Project is still not announced or anything and so I am just going to sit here and pout.
21 DavidinBerkeley // Jun 13, 2008 at 5:29 pm
I will also say to PeekaBoo that having once stood behind her car I can say that it is even cuter in person.
22 socalfrank // Jun 13, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Are you sure that’s Tom Selleck? He looks like a short fat Mexican guy.
23 Letty Cruz // Jun 13, 2008 at 10:27 pm
Looks like he could get ‘er started with one swift kick in its mini butt.
24 pal Jacky // Jun 14, 2008 at 5:22 pm
now tim russert is dead. I’m tellin’ you the clintons are startin’ up again. Vince foster was many years ago, true, but I never thought they stopped, they just put things on hold.b Teddy kennedy’s cancer, That is just bioterroism evil that only a former president could get his hands on. And their little jokes about bobby ‘68. They are up to something.
25 JohnnyBoy // Jun 14, 2008 at 7:25 pm
You got that right, JackyPal ! Don’t be too surprised at how this all unfolds.
Actually, maybe it is better to act surprised, though.
Things are about to get most interestinger
26 pal Jacky // Jun 15, 2008 at 9:32 am
Don’t get me wrong, I think the ‘make love, not war’ aspect of the clinton years was much better than what we have today. But that down’t mean they are not evil, they just didn’t practice it at the expense of the people, unlike the current administration. If the people are happy, you can do whatever fucking thing you want. Furthermore, I think most americans thought we were having a war for oil and they were fine with that, though they never would admit it. No it was a war for the oil companies and to keep hallburton busy with a lot of ‘rebuliding’ since it is the only company that does it. No war, no money for halliburton.
27 Speedy Cerviche // Jun 15, 2008 at 9:49 am
Those Italianos love Clarabelle the Cow. They just eat her up with a spoon.
I have family over there. I know how things work. I’m telling you, Italy has Clarabelle fever.
28 JohnnyBoy // Jun 15, 2008 at 5:07 pm
I’ve heard that, Speedy…….that’s pretty good !
palJacky….exactly….I ‘m easily bribeable
29 DavidinBerkeley // Jun 16, 2008 at 4:16 pm
I don’t see any rules anywhere about posting somewhere else about something someplace else, so I’m going to say here…
From listening to the podcast: How does Mr. K do it? How does he manage to buy new gizmos for them to try out on the podcast when he doesn’t have a gig anymore? Are there temp jobs for broadcasters? Or is he file-clerking somewhere?
30 JohnnyBoy // Jun 16, 2008 at 4:46 pm
David, that’s probably better to say it here…if you had said it under, say a more appropriate thread, then a few people go and comment here, one would be unable to tell that your comment ever existed.
maybe he has many K in the bank
31 pal Jacky // Jun 16, 2008 at 7:25 pm
david in berkeley, that is easy. Mr. K. is a common jew. He is, therefore, more evil than Heathen scum or a Koreans Obviously, when he has snuck into a christain’s house to steal their baby to eat, he swipes their I-pods as well.
Actually, my guess is that even though he’s been off the air for half a year off the air he gets a lot of free crap from marketers.
32 pal Jacky // Jun 16, 2008 at 9:07 pm
So Clarabelle the cow is popular with the Italians. I think it is time to turn the discussion to thie most repulsive of all European countries, Italy. Italy is the Mexico of Europe, filled with thieves and whores. Every city smells like rotten fish. Naturally in Florence and Venice this seems normal since fisherman often let their catch ripen on the banks before selling it, but it smells like it everywhere. Our troops during WWII thought it was because the women douched with cod liver oil since the scent makes Italian men horny. No one knows for sure but the country really does reek.
It is hard not to talk about Rome itself. Their favorite depiction of their God is him being executed. This shows just how degraded their civilization has become since the glory days of Nero. They also believe he George Romero-ed himself back to life three days later. It kind of makes the mud worshipers in Appalachia seem a little less primitive.
Researching rome is difficult because it is based on lies. Their idea of filmmaking can be summed up in a pervert named Fellini. One gets the idea from his movies that all the prosititutes were old and fat. It is sad that he was actually depicting the creme of the crop. Furthermore, he left out the V.D. that one can get just by walking down the same side of the street with them.Their greatest twentieth century composer, Respighi, a third rate Ravel clone, depicted this city in three overwrought and smaltzy tone poems. They are not taken seriously by anyone. For instance in ‘the fountains of rome’ , during the ‘trevi’ fountain sequence, their is no musical reference to the drunken men of Rome pissing in itdo. In fact, all the fountains of rome are nothing more than glorified public urinals. This is perhaps why respighi himself was so fond of them.
33 Speedy Cerviche // Jun 17, 2008 at 5:00 am
Hey, if they own iPods, then they deserve to have their babies eaten. Get a real PMP, Jesus Christ.
The most offensive thing in the world, I think, is a person with a bluetooth headset in one ear and a blazing white earbud in the other. If I ever saw this in real life, I would probably react with some form of violence.
34 Speedy Cerviche // Jun 17, 2008 at 5:03 am
Oh, and I wholeheartedly agree with JackyPal on the subject of Italy being a shithole. My experiences there have been limited, but uniformly horrible.
And “the Mexico of Europe” comment was pretty good.
35 JohnnyBoy // Jun 17, 2008 at 6:20 am
Any (German, Italian, Irish, Pole, Jew, etc) of any worth got their asses on the first boat out of that decaying continent to come here.
Oddly, I don’t know anyone from Spain or descended from such. I mean anyone who moved from there to here in the last 100 years…not Hispanics.
Know lots o Portuguese though
36 izzatso // Jun 17, 2008 at 10:12 am
What’s with Tom’s Simon Lagree mustache these days? And is it my imagination or is his hair blacker than his Magnum daze? Think socalfrank’s right, it’s the Mexican valet.
37 pal Jacky // Jun 17, 2008 at 11:49 am
The analogy just requires visiting any big city in each country. If you visit Rome, you notice lots of german and swedish people there on vactation drinking heavily and pissing in th trevi fountain like the natives. If you visit puerto vallarta you see lots of (real) Americans and canadans drinking heavily and pissing in the street like the natives. ‘I’ve got a little list song’ from Mikado starts automatically in my head when I see this sort of thing.
38 pal Jacky // Jun 17, 2008 at 11:57 am
of course, I don’t really need to say ‘on vacation’ since any one travelling to either Mexico or Italy on business has to be in some dark, secret, grotesque line of work. The type of work one doesn’t want their children to find out about. Like the mob or the fashion industry.
39 JohnnyBoy // Jun 17, 2008 at 12:22 pm
Unless they’re from the UK and say they’re on “holiday” obviously the Sun Constantly Sets On The British Empire Day, which is celebrated every day
40 DavidinBerkeley // Jun 17, 2008 at 1:11 pm
http://www.JohnFoley.com seems to be available.
In case anyone was wondering.
41 DavidinBerkeley // Jun 17, 2008 at 1:26 pm
IN CASE ANYONE WAS PLANNING TO DO THIS, IT’S ALREADY BEEN DONE
The finale from NORTH BY NORTHWEST recast with a parakeet: http://chrisleavins.typepad.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/2008/06/09/littlebirdy_ny_reneeyespainful.jpg
42 TalkinHorse // Jun 17, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Note that Fellini’s “Roma” will be broadcast on Turner’s TMC channel this Sunday night. It’s a mishmash of a film, but weird and hypnotic, like some crazy dope fugue. I remember the first time I saw a Fellini film, and my reaction was, “Huh?” Then I forgot about it and eventually wandered into another Fellini film, and this time I felt: “Huh?…but something about this seems almost familiar.” And some time after that, I realized that Fellini must be assimilated as one experiences a dream: Just go with it, and set aside all contemplation until you wake up. This is an acquired taste, and not for everyone. But a few will eventually find that Fellini almost makes sense, if only you can get enough of a vantage.
43 pal Jacky // Jun 17, 2008 at 3:32 pm
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen most of Fellini’s canon. My point is that even in ‘roma’ he kind of makes rome look like a cool place to visit. It is if like to watch tourists running after six year olds who have stolen their wallets. My favorite Fellini, not surprising is still ’satyricon’ followed by ‘8-1/2′. ‘Juliet of the Spirits’ is best enjoyed on hallucinogenics as is all the works by pasolini. Mario Bava is one of my favorites as is his apprentice Dario Argento. Argento is Ken Russell meets wes Craven and even when his movies aren’t very good(which is often) they are more interesting than 90% of the films out there.
He created the most vicious rape scene I have ever seen in the film ’stenhelm syndrome’ and it featured his own daughter, asia. How can anyone not like a sick fuck like that?
44 eBayEnigma // Jun 17, 2008 at 4:59 pm
My husband worked for the Mouse at one time also, and he agrees with vonreisling…it was junior high school with obscene amounts of money.
45 pal Jacky // Jun 17, 2008 at 6:28 pm
the reason there are few immigrants from spain in the united states is that they all go to South America. In Spain they love their fascists, Franco died thirty years after Mussilini and hitler, and so they flock to god forsaken places like brazil and bolivia and hang out as close to the germantowns built during the late 1940’s. In argentina they still worship the right wing nut dictator peron who had several wives all of which made Emilda Marcos seem discreet. That dreary fraud Andrew Load Webber even hacked out a musical based on one of his selfish bitches.
46 TalkinHorse // Jun 17, 2008 at 6:51 pm
Andrew Load Webber said something about an upcoming opera based upon one of my favorite novels, Bulgakov’s “The Master & Margarita”. I’m curious what might come out of that, assuming I can afford a ticket. There’s a talking cat, so we know it will be good.
47 JohnnyBoy // Jun 17, 2008 at 7:21 pm
I always confuse him with Andrew Dice Webber, who wrote “Fucking Cats”
From Wikipedia: On his website, Lloyd Webber announced that he was planning to write a sequel to The Phantom of the Opera, based on the novel, The Phantom of Manhattan, by Frederick Forsyth, who will collaborate.[12][13] The sequel is to be set in New York, although no further details have been given. In June 2007, parts of the new musical were inadvertently destroyed when Lloyd Webber’s cat, Otto, climbed up on his Clavinova digital piano, jumped onto the computer that held the score, and caused the score to be erased.[14]
48 pal Jacky // Jun 17, 2008 at 8:06 pm
That poor cat had obviously had enough of that drivel that hack calls music. i neglected to mention that a small insignificant number of Spanish have actually migrated to the US. They are so rightfully embarrassed by the culture and behavior of their olive skinned brethren from south of the border, that they change their name to something like ‘chad’ or ‘tina’ and pass themselves off as white.
49 JohnnyBoy // Jun 17, 2008 at 8:11 pm
that’d explain it
50 izzatso // Jun 17, 2008 at 9:52 pm
What’s all this poser chat @ Fellini and pissing in fountains? I happen to be part Italian and part Japanese, so I don’t know whether I should flap my arms around and be offended by this string or just miniaturize the components in my Iphone. As for Disney, when I worked there a sketch was being passed around of Minny finishing off a smiling Mickey, I’ll dig thru my storage and see if I can find it…
51 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 8:29 am
I’m half-Italian myself, so please don’t feel offended. We’re not making mock of people with an Italian background, we’re making fun of Italians in Italy
Which is perfectly acceptable
52 izzatso // Jun 18, 2008 at 9:05 am
I’m not really offended. It’s actually refreshing to engage in conversation about gumbas. Get’s old having Asian F.O.B.’s running up to me all the time asking “What are you?” Then seeing that quizzical look on their faces when I say my dad’s from Jersey. They think it might be an island near Guam.
53 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 10:05 am
Actually, it’s an island near Guernsey
Funny thing, that. Here in the NY area, we say Jersey, meaning New Jersey of course. But we’d never say York for NY , or England for New England, or Hampshire for NH
54 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 10:06 am
I have a friend who is 1/2 Sicilian, 1/2 Japanese
He looks Navajo
55 Speedy Cerviche // Jun 18, 2008 at 11:08 am
How about Mexico for New Mexico?
http://www.overheardintheoffice.com/archives/006960.html
56 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 11:52 am
I actually worked with a stupid bunt who wanted to know the exchange rate for New Mexico
57 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 11:54 am
Same one who read an address of Birmingham AL as Birmingham Alaska
58 izzatso // Jun 18, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Show’s to go ya’ that no price is too high for middle management to pay for their ignorance and/or sarcasm. Also, I can go in halfsies with Johnny Boy’s friend and open a casino. I had an Italian auto mechanic tell me my last name means “without shoes”. How lame is that?
59 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 1:11 pm
I have cousins whose name means “Shoes”, so do I just stick a “senza” in front of that?
60 izzatso // Jun 18, 2008 at 2:00 pm
It’s Scarzo, so is zo a shoe, and scar means without? Just guessing.
61 pal Jacky // Jun 18, 2008 at 2:22 pm
offended? the fact that one’s ancestors had the good sense to leave a sleazy cesspool like italy isn’t cause for offense. Do you think I’m offended when the slavs are depicted as ruthless, brutal, soulless, vicious mercenary types like in the ‘hostel’ films? Perhaps that isn’t a good example since who wouldn’t be proud to be born from that sort of stock.
62 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 7:41 pm
Senza (without)Scarpa (shoe)
though it is possible that Scarzo is a slang or abbreviation or some such for no shoes
63 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 7:44 pm
Scarzo , I think, means like scarce
64 JohnnyBoy // Jun 18, 2008 at 7:45 pm
so it is possible
65 izzatso // Jun 18, 2008 at 11:39 pm
Scarce shoes, kinda catchy
You must log in to post a comment.