I have tickets to see Liza at the Morongo Casino on July 18th.
I know. It’s almost too much to process.
Liza with a motherfucking Z, lisping and trembling and stumbling across the stage like some kind of ancient chihuahua in a sequined pancho. Nothing but jazz hands and pant suits, as far as the eye can see. I am beyond excited. I only hope to be as drunk as she is.
Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I have to say that I almost didn’t buy these tickets. When I first saw the billboards on the way to Palm Springs a few months back, it just didn’t click. Oh, I snorted and laughed, but the gravity of it all didn’t really sink in.
This morning, however, someone sent me a message on Facebook, asking me if I was going to go. And suddenly, the clouds parted.
Three little words popped into my head. Three words that made the difference. Yes, they were only three words, but what a story they told.
MICHAEL
JACKSON
TRIBUTE
Am I right?
Because there has to be one. There has to be some sort of slapped together, rushed, emotional tribute, and this is the time to see that hot mess. Now, when it’s still fresh, and she knows why she’s crying.
Obviously, I can’t say for sure what’s going to happen in this part of the show, but I think there are going to be slides. That’s what I think. Slides of them through the years; with Halston at Studio 54, at The Wiz wrap party, drinking Shirley Temples at Benihana, wearing leg warmers and rehearsing with Peter Gennaro, all those happy moments, all the way up to this freakfest. That’s what I’m thinking.
And I think she’ll be dressed in a glittering pantsuit, perched on a stool and bathed in a single light; and when the band eases into a slowed-down version of “The Way You Make Me Feel”, she’ll bring the microphone up to her lips and that’s when we see she’s wearing one glove.
14 responses so far ↓
1 Susie // Jul 3, 2009 at 12:50 am
Glad I’m drunk. I won’t remember this in the a.m.
2 RCoA // Jul 3, 2009 at 12:52 am
If our governor were smart, he’d tax the shit out of everything Michael Jackson-related. All of those private escorts over the years, all of the security, looking away when something drug-related came up, the molestation trial(s). It’s time the fans gave something back. The Staples event should cost $1000 per fan. Send that money to Sacramento. People would pay. This is big. Liza in Morongo, $400 (comp tix for April.) Usher: $700. Sliding scale based on fame index rating. California needs to start exploiting the stars for a change.
3 TalkinHorse // Jul 3, 2009 at 2:15 am
I don’t know a darned thing about any of these local casinos. I can’t be the only one who hears “Morongo” as “Moron, go!”?
Maybe we could tag along as April’s posse, and run some interference so it will be more difficult than usual to eject her from the premises. (Speaking of rushing the stage and taking over the show, and also apropos of April’s favorite artists…the Turner channel just re-ran “The King of Comedy”.)
4 SpicyD // Jul 3, 2009 at 5:08 am
When I saw this I nearly fell out of my chair. David & I are going to be in Hawaii that week. I was contemplating changing the trip because really how many concerts does she have left? Liza is in that rare category of performer (much like Carol Channing), where you will be able to say – “I was there the night she died in the middle of Act I but no one realized it till the curtain call.”
Alas it would be easier to move tectonic plates than to get David to Liza concert even if we didn’t have plans.
On to the tribute. April have you been to the California Casinos? Slide show? No way. She might bring a stack of prints from an old roll of 110 film. But there will not be an visual component.
5 Gunner13 // Jul 3, 2009 at 7:11 am
Jesus has nothing to do with this mess, it’s an entirely man made catastrophe.
@TalkinHorse – “Morongo” is actually short for “Moron, watch your $ go down the drain!” They changed it after their PR Department pointed out that this was a shade too obvious. Legal didn’t like it either.
Looking at the Freakfest Pic, it is difficult to select THE most frightening person in it. So many problems on display, so little interest in enumerating them.
I would love to be part of the posse (The Aprilists? The Winchellists? April’s Wenches/Wrenches? The Sack Artists?) and see just how bad, bad really is (not to mention the drunken horror that will be on stage), but I am out of state (as promised). Enjoy!
6 Auntie Vera Charles // Jul 3, 2009 at 8:40 am
Only ONE thing could make that evening any better!
Adore you.
7 Bitsey // Jul 3, 2009 at 10:47 am
http://ausiellofiles.ew.com/2009/06/drop-dead-diva-enlists-liza-minnelli-delta-burke.html
She’s also gonna appear with Delta Burke and Rosie O’Donnell. The Liza news just gets better.
April, you’re going to have to sneak a recording device into that concert. The world needs to hear Liza’s stirring rendition of “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’.”
8 clevelandphil // Jul 3, 2009 at 11:17 am
I hear the Westboro church is going to protest the Michael Jackson funeral at the Staples Center and I say Good for them. My taxes have to pay for this shit. I say NO!!!!
9 pal Jacky // Jul 3, 2009 at 11:49 am
They have to clear out quick because the circus is performences start We. I think they should actually bring in the circus a day early and just call the memorial a sideshow.
10 steve // Jul 3, 2009 at 1:02 pm
july 18th is my birthday, and I’ll be in Monterey. same state, same drunk.
11 Mavis // Jul 3, 2009 at 1:38 pm
SpicyD, I don’t wish her ill, but the headlines would be great, much in the same way other entertainers, like Nelson Eddy croaked singing on stage, plus afterwards, penny slots to fill in the time, while the press and emergency personnel are swarming the building.
12 pal Jacky // Jul 5, 2009 at 4:21 pm
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/schumansilver/detail?entry_id=42763
the undoctored photo is part of this article with the line ‘the wedding was almost a freak show’ in the text.
It is written by a micheal jackson fan who was at the nuptials.
To anyone else it was a ‘real’ freak show sans the gooba gaaba -gooba-gaaba’ and the ‘ I don’t want to be a pinhead no more, I just met a nurse that I could go for ‘Zippy’s ever popular question ‘are we having fun yet?’ never seemed more appropriate to ask
13 Stretch99 // Jul 10, 2009 at 9:40 am
again with the gayness…it all confirms why I love this site SOOO MUCH !!
14 steve // Jul 11, 2009 at 10:07 pm
http://blogs.villagevoice.com/dailymusto/archives/2009/07/liza_explains_s.php
god I wish I was going to her show.