“Now we can create a custom urn in the image of your loved one or favorite celebrity or hero!
Personal Urns combine art and the very latest in technology to create a family heirloom that will be cherished for generations.
They are built from just one or two photographs of the cherished persons face. This is the most heart warming and special memorial product available anywhere – “A Personal Urn”.
Available in Two Sizes:
Yes, now you can have the disembodied head of your recently deceased loved one, stuffed with its own remains like some kind of turducken of the damned.
Not into your husband’s head? Well, how about the head of “your hero”? They’ll whip that up for you, too! Just bring in a couple of snaps of say, Thurgood Marshall, and before you know it, your beloved will be enjoying eternity in his hollowed out fake head.
Sports more your thing? Who could resist the sloe-eyed gaze of Derek Jeter, watching you thoughtfully from the bookcase, with your loved one on his mind?
Or if the whole thing just isn’t creepy enough for you, have one made in your own image, and turn the whole fucking thing into a bong.
16 responses so far ↓
1 tear it up... // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:21 pm
The look on that face, instant migraine.
2 steve // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:33 pm
from their homepage: “Personal urns custom made in your likeness or your favorite celebraty [sic]”
and from the full-sized urn description: “Complexions can be adjusted in the final stages”
MJ hasn’t been buried yet, far as I know.
3 Sam Shepperd // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:49 pm
I kind of like this “biodegradable” urn. You just pour in the ashes and pitch it off the end of a pier or dock. But this is merely soft-core reverence for the dead. Real hard-core would be mummification, practiced on a large scale in Europe during the dark ages and by those too poor to afford a grave site in Mexico. and for the truly devoted – cannibalism. The remaining aboriginal societies practicing cannibalism prefer eating in the family as a show of respect and a way of giving them some form of life after death.
4 Sam Shepperd // Jul 31, 2009 at 10:50 pm
http://io9.com/355315/
5 bnaivar // Aug 1, 2009 at 5:54 am
This would be my Wife’s idea of finally giving me “head”.
6 joshpincusiscrying // Aug 1, 2009 at 9:12 am
This is creepier that the people kissing the animals is the Photo Dump post.
Did I say “creepier”? I meant “cooler”.
7 joshpincusiscrying // Aug 1, 2009 at 9:13 am
and “Turducken of the Damed” sounds like a band name.
8 pal Jacky // Aug 1, 2009 at 10:30 am
I ordered one last week. one of my dogs turns 16 on labor day, and she is just getting more and more tired by the day. I just wanted her to spend eternityin an urn shaped as her favorite, April winchell. She’s a peke so there will be room for my other peke when his time comes too. Hopefully there will be room for me.
9 Ira Shlamazel // Aug 1, 2009 at 11:09 am
I wanna be in Regis Philbin’s head!
10 Ira Shlamazel // Aug 1, 2009 at 11:14 am
Can the “Keepsake-Sized Personal Urn” be shaped like my loved one’s hard dick?
Now THAT would be handy…
11 Dylan // Aug 1, 2009 at 12:16 pm
Does it have to look like you? I’d love to have my remains stored in a head that resembled Colonel Sanders or perhaps Dick Cheney.
12 pal Jacky // Aug 1, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Just be very specific with these morons. Fed Ex just dropped off the package. I thought I was clear; I thought I sent enough pictures. I’m not putting anybody’s ashes in an urn shaped like Andy Dick eating a cob of corn.
13 Stretch99 // Aug 3, 2009 at 9:15 am
I just saw my buddies pictures from Comic-Con. Spongebob looks OK – but Patrick looks like a giant pink marital aid. I wonder if he vibrates…
14 Stretch99 // Aug 3, 2009 at 11:57 am
Oh and April – on DanceDance revolution: WAS THAT A CHICKEN JOKE?!!
sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me
15 Glo // Aug 6, 2009 at 8:29 pm
A wig, a hat and some sunglasses…not so bad.
16 Pookie // Aug 28, 2009 at 3:14 pm
yeah, but all my relatives are from Arkansas. they didn’t think about the fly-over states, did they? before flouride? come on. i’m not having nunna my cousins heads around.
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