Well, they may have something here. I’m an Atheist, and I’m very bitter.
By the way, the only way a child would see someone in their bathrobe with a cup of coffee is if they came to their house. Early. Uninvited.
Hey, there’s a safety tip, huh Lambuel?
- More here
20 responses so far ↓
1 Kim Scarborough // Sep 17, 2009 at 10:35 am
Pretty sure this is a joke. These guys are affiliated with the Landover Baptist people (which is also a parody site).
2 Tweets that mention April Winchell » Spiritual Safety Tip -- Topsy.com // Sep 17, 2009 at 10:39 am
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jaime Arkin. Jaime Arkin said: RT @aprilwinchell: Spiritual Safety Tip: http://bit.ly/i7oSk and the full site… http://bit.ly/mT0K [...]
3 Stretch99 // Sep 17, 2009 at 10:52 am
…Mr Gruff is an old goat – GET IT
and he is just fine as he is.
If there is something to witness – just tug on his bathrobe string.
wait that was a porn I saw once – and it wasn’t Mr Gruff it was Chad Douglas who is more donkey and less goat
ok then carry on…
4 insert_funny // Sep 17, 2009 at 11:12 am
Who do these people think they are, assuming all atheists are wearing bathrobes when they confront the little Christian soldiers at their door? I’m sure some of them are quite well dressed.
Sure it’s because they fell asleep in their clothes the night before, but that’s entirely beside the point here.
5 Melissa // Sep 17, 2009 at 11:30 am
I’m an atheist, am grumpy and bitter, until of course I can lash out at children. That brightens my day immensely.
I wish they would take their own advice and simply AVOID TALKING TO us! Isn’t that what we all want?!
6 RCoA // Sep 17, 2009 at 12:11 pm
If I were religious, I’d pray for the pious to stop using comic sans.
7 ShannonS // Sep 17, 2009 at 12:20 pm
I wouldn’t call myself an Atheist but do you think I can get these people to keep their little bastards away from me too?
8 Andre // Sep 17, 2009 at 12:34 pm
Yeah! Get off my lawn you damn kids!
(Hee hee…”kids”…get it?)
9 jasonthegreat // Sep 17, 2009 at 12:35 pm
Okay, that’s what I call great–if overly subtle–satire. It took me several pages of the objectiveministries website before I was sure it was a gag.
(And it definitely is. Read the Member Bios area if you’re unsure.)
10 jim // Sep 17, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Atheist? Check (although I think “skeptic” or “realist” are better terms).
But I must confess that I’m actually morbidly cheerful. This may be related to my ongoing penchant for committing artificial mass-murder via my laptop on my days off – or on my constant avoidance of other human beings. Truly, It Is A Mystery!
Bitter? Hmm. I prefer “tangy” – & I’m not getting old … I’m RIPENING (stay upwind & you should be fine).
“Mr. Gruff” reminds me of Bill Hicks’ “Goatboy” routine.
11 ScottP // Sep 17, 2009 at 11:27 pm
I hope Gruff is included in the L.A. Times’ next “I don’t want to go ANYWHERE on Sunday!” subscription commercial…
12 bnaivar // Sep 18, 2009 at 4:30 am
oy.
13 basilwhite // Sep 18, 2009 at 2:13 pm
I’m an agnostic, where’s my field guide? The only Christian I can spot in the field is a Pentacostal because of the long skirt.
14 basilwhite // Sep 18, 2009 at 2:18 pm
Christians think I’m crotchety and sad because I’m crotchety and sad when THEY’RE AROUND.
As soon as they leave, the party starts.
15 ListenerJustin // Sep 18, 2009 at 2:50 pm
Alright, I’m a pretty regular reader of parody sites like Betty Bowers, Landover Baptist and such, but I admit I’m having a tough time deciding whether this Lambuel site is a joke or not. It’s got such a Landover feel. How’s a guy to know? Oh, wait! I’ll just ask Jesus!
16 ListenerJustin // Sep 18, 2009 at 2:55 pm
Yeah, ok. I’m a little slow on the uptake today.
17 Edna Fernbaum // Sep 19, 2009 at 5:48 pm
This is probably the coolest most deserved trouncing anyone’s ever received and I only wish I could see you deliver it to her live and in person; maybe with the added touch of shoving some mottled tofu in her mouth or as you walk away, toss a no fat half caf low carb dingleberry slim pim jim trim faux mocha chai shake in her face. She has more nerve than Hitler and I’m so glad you laid into her. I’ve decided that you’re now my Grateful Dead and I am your Dead Head, figuratively, of course. Don’t worry, I’m too far away to be a stalker or anything and I’m a grandmother and we don’t stalk. Seriously, well done.
18 Glo // Sep 19, 2009 at 8:51 pm
Coffee…check! Robe…check! Grumpy…double check!And yet the little darling keep ringing my bell with their endless attempts to save me. OK, now I know what I have been doing wrong…no horns! eBay here I come.
19 Irvingstark // Sep 20, 2009 at 4:31 pm
I would comment, but I am ignoring you… A Goat? Really? Everyone knows Goat’s don’t LIKE bathrobes, don’t they?? Anyone…..?? Can I get a witness?
20 TheClammer // Sep 29, 2009 at 1:46 pm
O dear god. I admire you even more now that I know you are the atheist. peace be with you dear girl.
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